Any 'Spin Lawyers

[saxonyron]

By the way, what's a differential equation?

? For me, it was kind of like a root canal, but the dentist forgot the novocaine.? ? I took the "Gentleman's C" in diff-e-q.? I love engineering, but damn, I never took much of a shine to advanced calculus.? Good luck in school, Max!? I'm happy with where I am now, but 20 years out of college, if I could hit the rewind button, I would have gone to Law School - with my engineering degree. There is serious demand for lawyers with engineering degrees.? The dad of one of my kid's friends has an engineering degree (mechanical, like mine), and is working for a good salary ($100k)  for a law firm full time while they put him thru law school at nights.? And he's 43 - even older than me!? ?? I'd do it in a heart beat, except that my own business is doing pretty well and I'd have to take a cut in pay.? He's basically guaranteed a $250k base when he's done in a 2 or 3 years.

[J86]

Without being too vague or specific, I'm headed to an ABA-approved New England school with a great local reputation.? As far as my pursuits, I'm totally open minded--I'll see what courses interest me the most.

Good call.? I double-majored as an undergraduate in history and archaeology.? For the past two years I've worked in biomedical research.? I think if you channel yourself into a pre-law or pre-anything program too early you're missing out on a lot.

By the way, what's a differential equation?

Cool cool, I'm probably headed to Boston area myself for school

[SVT_Power]

He edited my essays in the last school year.

No I'm not a Canadian-born Canuck. I immigrated from India when I was 3, in 1992. All my schooling was done here.

honestly i dont think it makes a difference between being born here and coming here when you're that little. I came to canada when I was 9 (next march would mean i've spent half of my life in korea and half in canada).

[IrishGuy]

  For me, it was kind of like a root canal, but the dentist forgot the novocaine.    I took the "Gentleman's C" in diff-e-q.  I love engineering, but damn, I never took much of a shine to advanced calculus.  Good luck in school, Max!  I'm happy with where I am now, but 20 years out of college, if I could hit the rewind button, I would have gone to Law School - with my engineering degree. There is serious demand for lawyers with engineering degrees.  The dad of one of my kid's friends has an engineering degree (mechanical, like mine), and is working for a good salary ($100k)  for a law firm full time while they put him thru law school at nights.  And he's 43 - even older than me!     I'd do it in a heart beat, except that my own business is doing pretty well and I'd have to take a cut in pay.  He's basically guaranteed a $250k base when he's done in a 2 or 3 years.

Differential equations kicked my butt. If only I had known I would have to take up to calc IV for my B.S. in Computer Engineering Tech. Luckily I made it through and kept my GPA up (even with the damn C).

And hey, it pays off in the end... I think... maybe someday... 

[MX793]

Ron, where were you in Benzboy's thread in GT? That is exactly what all of this big headed engineers/engineering students need to hear

Sometimes I wonder if people dwell too much on "the money" when they look at career choices.  I would much rather earn a more modest wage doing a job from which I can get a sense of satisfaction than toiling away for a mint at a job I loathe.  That's not to say that law or finance can't be rewarding (beyond money) or satisfying jobs, but I think that there are too many people who look at how much money they could possibly make and then make their career choices based almost exclusively on that number.

And for all you finance folks who like to flaunt that you can make more than engineers while having an easier go of it at college or like to call engineers big headed, consider the following:  engineering is hard because it can carry a great deal more weight than other occupations.  When an engineer screws up, lives can be at stake.  A miscalculation that goes unnoticed can result death.  Next time you step onto an airplane or a bridge or a high-rise, consider that your life and safety is to some degree resting on the shoulders of the men and women who designed and built that plane, bridge, or building.  When was the last time someone died because an accountant forgot to carry a 1 or because some high-paid corporate lawyer lost a case due to an error in judgement?

[dazzleman]

Sometimes I wonder if people dwell too much on "the money" when they look at career choices.  I would much rather earn a more modest wage doing a job from which I can get a sense of satisfaction than toiling away for a mint at a job I loathe.  That's not to say that law or finance can't be rewarding (beyond money) or satisfying jobs, but I think that there are too many people who look at how much money they could possibly make and then make their career choices based almost exclusively on that number.

And for all you finance folks who like to flaunt that you can make more than engineers while having an easier go of it at college or like to call engineers big headed, consider the following:  engineering is hard because it can carry a great deal more weight than other occupations.  When an engineer screws up, lives can be at stake.  A miscalculation that goes unnoticed can result death.  Next time you step onto an airplane or a bridge or a high-rise, consider that your life and safety is to some degree resting on the shoulders of the men and women who designed and built that plane, bridge, or building.  When was the last time someone died because an accountant forgot to carry a 1 or because some high-paid corporate lawyer lost a case due to an error in judgement?

I agree that a person should never choose a career simply because of money.  Money can surely be a factor in the decision, but nobody should do something they hate, or for which they are not suited, simply for money.

Generally speaking, if you choose a career in something you like and are good at, the money will come, one way or another.  To choose something in which you have no interest just for the money will set you up for failure, and the money may never come in that case.

[GoCougs]

The guys making big money in finance and law are the exception. The majority simply make a living.

[sandertheshark]

(I'm officially hijacking this thread with old lawyer jokes. )

The devil visited a lawyer's office and made him an offer. "I can arrange some things for you, " the devil said. "I'll increase your income five-fold. Your partners will love you; your clients will respect you; you'll have four months of vacation each year and live to be a hundred. All I require in return is that your wife's soul, your children's souls, and their children's souls rot in hell for eternity."

The lawyer thought for a moment. "What's the catch?" he asked.

[sandertheshark]

The day after a verdict had been entered against his client, the lawyer rushed to the judge's chambers, demanding that the case be reopened, saying: "I have new evidence that makes a huge difference in my client's defense."

The judge asked, "What new evidence could you have?"

The lawyer replied, "My client has an extra $10,000, and I just found out about it!"

[sandertheshark]

An old man was on his death bed. He wanted badly to take some of his money with him. He called his priest, his doctor and his lawyer to his bedside. "Here's $30,000 cash to be held by each of you. I trust you to put this in my coffin when I die so I can take all my money with me."

At the funeral, each man put an envelope in the coffin. Riding away in a limousine, the priest suddenly broke into tears and confessed, "I had only put $20,000 into the envelope because I needed $10,000 for a new baptistery."

"Well, since we're confiding in each other," said the doctor, "I only put $10,000 in the envelope because we needed a new machine at the hospital which cost $20,000."

The lawyer was aghast. "I'm ashamed of both of you," he exclaimed. "I want it known that when I put my envelope in that coffin, it held my personal check for the full $30,000."

[sandertheshark]

How many lawyers does it take to change a light bulb?

Fifty four. Eight to argue, one to get a continuance, one to object, one to demur, two to research precedents, one to dictate a letter, one to stipulate, five to turn in their time cards, one to depose, one to write interrogatories, two to settle, one to order a secretary to change the bulb, and twenty-eight to bill for professional services.

[sandertheshark]

Two little squirrels were walking along in the forest. The first one spied a nut and cried out, "Oh, look! A nut!" The second squirrel jumped on it and said, "It?s my nut!"
The first squirrel said, "That?s not fair! I saw it first!"

"Well, you may have seen it, but I have it," argued the second.

At that point, a lawyer squirrel came up and said, "You shouldn?t quarrel.  Let me resolve this dispute." The two squirrels nodded, and the lawyer squirrel said, "Now, give me the nut." He broke the nut in half, and handed half to each squirrel, saying, "See? It was foolish of you to fight. Now the dispute is resolved."

Then he reached over and said, "And for my fee, I?ll take the meat."

[sandertheshark]

What's the difference between a bankrupt attorney and a pigeon?

The pigeon can still make a deposit on a Mercedes.

[sandertheshark]

 How can you tell the difference between a dead skunk and a dead attorney on the road?

The vultures aren't gagging over the skunk.

[sandertheshark]

What's the difference between a lawyer and a terrorist?

You can negotiate with a terrorist.

[sandertheshark]

What's the difference between a lawyer and a trampoline?

You take off your shoes before you jump on a trampoline.

[sandertheshark]

What do honest lawyers and UFOs have in common?

You always hear about them, but you never see them.

[sandertheshark]

What's black and brown and looks good on an attorney?

A doberman pinscher.

[sandertheshark]

What's the difference between a dead dog in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?

There are skid marks in front of the dog.

[sandertheshark]

What's wrong with lawyer jokes?

Lawyers don't think they're funny, and nobody else thinks they're jokes.

[Rupert]

What's the difference between a lawyer dead baby and a trampoline?

You take off your shoes before you jump on a trampoline.

That's more like it!

[Rupert]

The lawyer was aghast. "I'm ashamed of both of you," he exclaimed. "I want it known that when I put my envelope in that coffin, it held my personal check for the full $30,000."

That man is a genius!

[MaxPower]

(I'm officially hijacking this thread with old lawyer jokes. )

At my going-away staff party, a few of my coworkers printed a ton lawyer jokes and put them around the room as party favors.  We spent about an hour going through them, making fun of lawyers, and generally having a good time! 


Why won't a shark eat a lawyer?  Professional courtesy.

[J86]

whats the difference between a hooker and  a lawyer?

a hooker will stop fucking you when youre dead.