Car and Driver's interim editor deserves a pulitzer!

[Laconian]

This was intended to go where Csere's Steering Column used to be. I'm blown away by the depth of this man's insight.

http://jalopnik.com/5126686/hachette+appointed-interim-editor-john-owens-leaked-car--driver-editors-column?skyline=true&s=x

    File Name: EditorColumn4.doc
    Date Due: Jan 15
    Date Submitted: Jan 8
    Assigned Count: 950-975 words; 5600-5700 characters
    Actual Count: 810 words as submitted

    [TITLE] THE GREAT UNDER-RATED
    [BLURB] FIVE CARS THAT SHOULD BE STARS.
    SUGGESTED CALLOUT ????

    When the topic is iron, aluminum, and sheetmetal, the know-it-alls are like talking dolls. Pull the string, and they're yammering about the all-stars. BMW, Mercedes, Por-sche, Zs, blah, blah, blah. Thanks, but it's all been said before. So I'll pass on this conver-sation and concentrate on emptying the nut bowl.
    What would be interesting is to hear someone stand up for Hyundai, or heaven forbid, Pontiac. Because to do that, you'd really have to know cars.
    Interestingly, those very names jumped to the top when the talk in the Car and Driver offices recently turned to under-rated cars. Vehicles we know and love that haven't caught on with car-buyers the way we be-lieve they should.
    "What's under-rated? Anything Korean or American," quipped Mike Dushane, Executive Editor of CarandDriver.com.
    As you can see by our list of overlooked gems, there's truth in that. Though each one isn't a hard-core enthusiast car, each de-serves more respect.
    Pontiac G8 GT
    This Aussie import has nothing left to prove. Yet where's the love?
    It beat the Dodge Charger R/T in our shootout (June 2008). With the optional 6.0-liter V-8, it's a rocket off the line (0-60 in 5.2 sec). A braking champ, too, with stop-ping power that rivals a tailhook on the flight deck. Inside are the best seats of any GM car.
    "And It drives like an old BMW," says Associate Editor Tony Quiroga.
    A backhanded compliment?
    Not at all," insists G8 fan Quiroga. "That's better than 99% of the cars on the road."
    Okay, its radio is so awful that the INS should deport it for crimes against ears, but the G8 remains one helluva deal, selling in the $30k range set up the way a serious driver would want.
    Hyundai Santa Fe
    Here in the crossover class, the Nissan Murano casts a big shadow. The Nissan did, after all, outscore the Santa Fee and all other contenders in our crossover shootout last year (June 2008).
    We like the stiffness and snap of the Murano's handling, but we all have neighbors who prefer a cushy, luxe-car ride, and for them, the Santa Fe is the way to go. It also will save them a few bucks over the Murano (granted in the $32k Limited AWD dress, only a few). Another practical consideration: unlike the Murano, the Santa Fe can be fitted with third- row seats.
    Perhaps the Santa Fe will get closer to the spotlight thanks to the widespread praise for Hyundai's new Lexus-challenging sedan, the Genesis. Or, more than likely, this refined but decidedly unglamorous family-hauler will end of up in the shadow of its sexy new sister.
    Infinity M45 Sport
    How can you whoop a BMW (550i), a Mercedes (E550), and a Lexus (GS450h), yet still not achieve top-of-mind greatness? Dunno, but the M45's done it. Granted, the whooping took place in our November 2006 issue, but the fundamentals that brought the M45 to victory remain: good looks, lots of performance, and more than those other mar-ques give you for 50 grand. Its 0-60, 0-100, and 0-130 times are (at 5.9, 14.5, and 28.4 sec, respectively) the slowest of its peer group. Its braking and steering, however, are enviable. And let's not forget the theme of the $50k bargain.
    "You get a V-8 for a V-6 price," says Quiroga. "In fact, with today's 5-Series, you'd only get an inline six for that money."
    Mazda 5
    "This one flies under the radar," says Ex-ecutive Editor Mark Gillies, "but it's a terri-fic little people-mover.
    Six people in all, along with assorted soc-cer balls, hockey skates, or paraphernalia for a Wicken sacrifice.
    "Dirt cheap," comes a chorus from the Tech Department. Especially when com-pared with the larger Nissan Quest ($18k vs. $27k, base).
    "And it's available with a manual trans-mission," adds Erik Johnson, website Senior Editor. "It's the only vehicle with sliding doors that has that option."
    Add to that a spunky, 2.3-liter inline-4, and you've got (oxymoron alert!) a car-enthusiast's minivan.
    Ford Fusion SE
    Okay, it finished third in this month's shootout against the Mazda 6i and Honda Accord EX-L ("Hidden Talents," page xxx). But as Contributing Editor Barry Winfield says in the article, "Even if we had 10 cars in this comparo, the Fusion would still be in the top three." Surprising for the progeny of Detroit? Not for those of us who've been looking closely.
    "The chassis, the drivetrain, they're all very sound," says shootout writer Tony Swan. "And terrific quality." Fit, finish, en-gineering. Take that, American-car skeptics.
    The suspension isn't enthusiast taut, but it's great for those craving transportation that's comfortable, low-cost ($tk), and fuel-miserly (24 mpg in our winding-road test runs). It's far from perfect (Swan hates the chrome), but the latest version of the Fusion is an exceptional mid-sized car. Turn to the shootout for all the details.

[the Teuton]

I feel like puking.  I need to submit my resume for srsly.

[the Teuton]

And he doesn't know how to find good quotes, either!  Argh!

Everything he quoted deserves to be paraphrased because it's about as interesting as the dead skin inside my belly button!

Argh!

[Tave]

That guy really loves his hyphens.

[the Teuton]

That guy really loves his hyphens.

Pagemaker, InDesign, and Quark all automatically add hyphens, especially when you have 3-column format.  I blame the mid-word hyphens on that.  Otherwise, it's all him.

[sportyaccordy]

I mean it wasn't great but it wasn't terrible....

[the Teuton]

I mean it wasn't great but it wasn't terrible....

Please tell me you're kidding...

We had high school sophomores write better columns than that when I was an opinion editor for my hs paper. 

It's terrible.

[SVT666]

Most of it was quotes, so I don't know how you can properly critique his writing skills.

[the Teuton]

Most of it was quotes, so I don't know how you can properly critique his writing skills.

They were terrible quotes, meaning he has no idea how to conduct proper interviews, an integral part of journalism.

And the structure of it was smooth like wiping a baby's ass with sandpaper.

[SVT666]

They were terrible quotes, meaning he has no idea how to conduct proper interviews, an integral part of journalism.

And the structure of it was smooth like wiping a baby's ass with sandpaper.

It sounds like it was a group discussion, not an interview.

[Laconian]

I deserve a Pulitzer. I forgot to capitalize the P in the topic.

[ifcar]

I'm sure it will read better after it's been edited. And you don't necessarily have to be a good writer to be a good editor.

But still...

[280Z Turbo]

I stopped reading after blah-blah-blah.

[giant_mtb]

That was quite...lame.  It didn't make me feel any better.  Too many quotes, and he didn't really...prove much of anything besides the fact that the Pontiac G8, Hyundai Santa Fe, and Ford Fusion are good vehicles. 

What do I do now?  Just...stop reading and...hope there's a conclusion or point?  I mean...huh?

[sportyaccordy]

His writing kind of reminds me of Atomic...

[Secret Chimp]

Boring...

[AutobahnSHO]

I wanna Mazda 5.
Dunno why.

^^
Better writing than that Pulitzer-piece above.

[gasoline]

I think this was a joke from Jalopnik.

[ifcar]

I think this was a joke from Jalopnik.

I don't think so.