An automotive technician's rant.

[shp4man]

Had a customer the other day that thought I was trying to take advantage of him. His car had a problem with the battery cable, causing low/high voltage changes in the car's electrical system. It was a 2012 model, with electronic modules controlling damn near everything in the car. He couldn't believe a battery cable could cause a transmission issue. Trashed me on a social media sight.
Had another guy that installed a motorhome tow package on a similar vehicle. The contraption tied into the braking system and the electrical system- holy crap, nothing but problems. Shitloads of trouble codes in all the modules on the network.  This guy thought that Ford should warranty this disaster.

Just a few words of wisdom for these people.....IT AIN"T FUCKING 1964 ANY MORE, GOD DAMN IT!

Sorry, just had to vent a little bit. Whew...feel a little better now. 

[Onslaught]

Cars suck now. You put a door on a German car and it must go to the dealership to have 8 million codes fixed. It's like working on a computer. And I hate computers.

[giant_mtb]

It is pretty annoying the depth and intricacy and inter-wired-ness of car electrical systems today. Makes things that used to be basic and simple super complex and annoying to the point that a lot of people can't work on their own cars as much as they used to be able to because they need a friggin' crazy computer tool just to diagnose.

[Onslaught]

I was working on a Chevy Cruze today and noticed that the drive belt went around the engine mount. I couldn't see any way of changing the belt without removing the engine mount. Tell me how many normal people could do that at their home?

[Soup DeVille]

An upper mount. Yeah, my wife's old Grand Am did that too.

Anyways, I deal daily with the problems of the programming of god damned sunroof motors. And yes, Can-bus driven car networks are very voltage sensitive.

[Madman]

Cars are just getting too damn complicated.  I think we have passed the point of diminishing returns as far as in-car technology goes.  Hell, I'm already scared shitless to touch anything on my 2003 Passat, and that car doesn't even have half the bullshit in it that some of these new cars have!

[Morris Minor]

Cars are just getting too damn complicated.  I think we have passed the point of diminishing returns as far as in-car technology goes.  Hell, I'm already scared shitless to touch anything on my 2003 Passat, and that car doesn't even have half the bullshit in it that some of these new cars have!

I think they are going to become even more complicated - continuing down the path of spatial awareness & able to self-navigate.

[Byteme]

It is pretty annoying the depth and intricacy and inter-wired-ness of car electrical systems today. Makes things that used to be basic and simple super complex and annoying to the point that a lot of people can't work on their own cars as much as they used to be able to because they need a friggin' crazy computer tool just to diagnose.

That's why I laugh when I see a new car stalled by the road and the first thing thw owner does is get out and pop the hood and examine whatever he can see.   Heck, on most new cars you can't even see the engine, let alone diagnose and fix it on the side of the road.  "Look dear, here's the problem, defective engine shroud".   

[Eye of the Tiger]

The real problem is that people are stupid. Half of the so-called mechanics are butt-stupid, and 97.5% of car owners are even stupider.

[giant_mtb]

That's why I laugh when I see a new car stalled by the road and the first thing thw owner does is get out and pop the hood and examine whatever he can see.   Heck, on most new cars you can't even see the engine, let alone diagnose and fix it on the side of the road.  "Look dear, here's the problem, defective engine shroud".   

Yup. We've gone from being able to do simple roadside fixes to saying "Well..." and pulling out our cell phones. It's just unavoidable in most cases, sadly. I am gonna be one sad dude the day that happens to me in the Audi. *knock on wood*

[MX793]

Yup. We've gone from being able to do simple roadside fixes to saying "Well..." and pulling out our cell phones. It's just unavoidable in most cases, sadly. I am gonna be one sad dude the day that happens to me in the Audi. *knock on wood*

And then there's the fact that most people don't even know how to fix the stuff that's very easy to fix.  I was at a muffler shop (sort of a full service place, but they specialize in mufflers and brakes) the other day getting a new hanger bracket welded onto my exhaust (thank you, rust belt), and an older gentleman driving a previous-gen Impala comes in and says "I need somebody to put some windshield wipers on my car".  I was dumbfounded.  Especially because this gentleman was from the generation when people knew how to fix basic items like changing their own windshield wipers.  You don't even need tools.

[giant_mtb]

That's kinda sad. Windshield wipers...they're one of the easy things left to DIY.

[FoMoJo]

That's kinda sad. Windshield wipers...they're one of the easy things left to DIY.

My wife wouldn't have a clue how to change them.  If she tried, she would try to twist them off and break the entire mechanism.

[giant_mtb]

That's true. Same with my mom. Which is why I usually end up being the one to say "mom, your wipers are crap, I'm gonna change them." 

[ifcar]

And then there's the fact that most people don't even know how to fix the stuff that's very easy to fix.  I was at a muffler shop (sort of a full service place, but they specialize in mufflers and brakes) the other day getting a new hanger bracket welded onto my exhaust (thank you, rust belt), and an older gentleman driving a previous-gen Impala comes in and says "I need somebody to put some windshield wipers on my car".  I was dumbfounded.  Especially because this gentleman was from the generation when people knew how to fix basic items like changing their own windshield wipers.  You don't even need tools.

I buy my wiper blades at Advance Auto Parts, where they give free installation. I just treat it as an insurance policy -- if my wipers get damaged during the installation, it's on them rather than me.

[Byteme]

I buy my wiper blades at Advance Auto Parts, where they give free installation. I just treat it as an insurance policy -- if my wipers get damaged during the installation, it's on them rather than me.

Yeah, the hassle of having a big scratch on the hood or fender outweighs any benefit of having the clerk at Advance change my blades.

[giant_mtb]

Yeah, 'cause I'm sure Advance gives you a contract that says "if your wipers fuck up, it's our fault and we'll pay to replace your windshield."



That's pure laziness and/or lack of accountability, IMO. If you're scared to change your fuggin' windshield wipers because you think you might screw it up enough to cause damage to your car...you've got a problem.

[ifcar]

I'm thinking more about the little clips that hold the pieces of the wiper assembly together, not that there's any chance of the hood or windshield being damaged.

[giant_mtb]

Okay, let me rephrase:

"I'm sure Advance gives you a contract that says if the little clips that hold the pieces of the wiper assembly together fail, it's our fault and we'll replace your wipers."

[giant_mtb]

I thought you were an automotive journalist/enthusiast or something. But you're afraid to change your own windshield wipers?  This is exactly the kind of shit we're talking about here. lol

[Secret Chimp]

I buy my wiper blades at Advance Auto Parts, where they give free installation. I just treat it as an insurance policy -- if my wipers get damaged during the installation, it's on them rather than me.

Dude, come on. You'd have to hit your car with the wipers to damage them during installation. Like wind up and smack the windshield.

[ifcar]

I thought you were an automotive journalist/enthusiast or something. But you're afraid to change your own windshield wipers?  This is exactly the kind of shit we're talking about here. lol

Yes, terrified.

I've done it myself and I've had others do it for me, and when the old one won't come out smoothly or when the new one isn't fitting easily, I'd rather have someone else fighting with it.

I'm glad everyone else is too proud to take the free service; keeps the cost down for those of us who don't need to beat our chests over windshield wiper blades.

[giant_mtb]

If you aren't a total idiot, there's never a "fight" to be had with a fucking windshield wiper.


Also, please do explain how the "free" wiper installation from AutoBlow is any cheaper than the, uh, free installation you do in 5 minutes yourself. What is this "cost savings" you speak of.

It's a windshield wiper.

[giant_mtb]

Oh, by the way:

[Rupert]

On the one hand, windshield wipers are pretty simple.

On the other, there is nothing about being a car enthusiast that means you have to like working on cars, and knowing all there is to know about windshield wipers really isn't all that important for anything at all.

Finally, giant, the bag of dicks in your mouth gets awfully distracting when you get this righteously indignant.

[giant_mtb]

I'm drunk, sorry.

[Soup DeVille]

Funny you mention that, because I change my wiper blades with my dick. Even in the cold.

[giant_mtb]

FUCKIN RIGHT EH?

[shp4man]

That's weird because sometimes when the battery is disconnected or replaced in a few cars, you have to re-synchronize the wipers with a manufacturer specific scan tool. Otherwise the wiper arms slam into the cowl, or self destruct on the windshield trim. Welcome to 2014! 

[Rupert]

Funny you mention that, because I change my wiper blades with my dick. Even in the cold.

This reminds me a conversation I once had.